Lately I have seen this question asked a lot and that is:
“If you had a magic wand and could go back and change your past, would you go back and change it or leave it the same?”
When seeing this question I answer this with a Strong NO, and the reason I answer this with a No is I wouldn’t be The strong-willed person I am today if I didn’t go through what I did. I wouldn’t have been able to teach my children how to be strong, independent girls/woman they are today.
I have also taught my children to follow their dreams as life can change in the blink of an eye and enjoy every moment you have. I have taught them what love is, something that wasn’t taught to me. So when I see this question I could never say anything else, but no.
I struggle every day with my demons, I also struggle every day in pain, but I couldn’t have been able to fight my battles without realising my strengths. I wouldn’t wish what I went through on anyone, I wouldn’t want to go through it all over again, but I can’t ever change what happened to me I can only learn to move forward.
At the end of the day I’m just grateful that I could use my knowledge to teach my children.
What’s your thoughts on this question? Would you change your past?
One question I ask myself all the time is how am I not selfish? I know it’s weird to say, but I wonder this as going through so much trauma in my life people have been selfless when it came to how I felt, so how is it that over these years I am still not selfish?
I ask myself, is it the fear of losing people I do all I can to not lose them? But then I do all I can for my children and know I’m not going to lose them. Is it just because I know what it feels like to hurt from peoples selflessness that I can’t bring myself to hurt others?
I think how do I still think about others feelings when mine were destroyed? How did I not become mean? I don’t forgive anyone for what they did to me and sure haven’t forgotten, I have chosen to put it in a hidden part of my brain so I don’t have to think about it. People always say to forgive and forget, but there are defiantly things in your life you can’t forgive and forget.
I’m grateful I didn’t turn mean or selfish. How did you turn out after trauma?
I wanted to talk about things that I can’t handle people saying when you are struggling. The quotes people say that don’t help when you feel so down and feel like there’s no hope. These quotes drive me insane. If only these people could put themselves in our shoes for one day they wouldn’t say them.
These quotes I’m talking about are :
“Take deep breaths” “Take one step at a time” “Don’t dwell on the past” “Don’t think so much” “Keep your chin up” “Tomorrow’s another day”
Seriously do they really think we want to dwell on the past, my past is what got me in this situation! Every step I take is a massive achievement for me, do they not think I would appreciate every step I take. People really need to think about what they say before saying anything. It doesn’t help when we are at our weakest point. We need positivity. Think about what you say before saying anything, it can make a huge difference to someone’s mental wellbeing.