Unseen signs

When I think back about my childhood I come to realize that I showed a lot of signs of depression, I didn’t understand what I was doing was for a reason. I understand now that maybe what I was doing was due to how I was feeling.

I remember piecing my skin with a pin when I was only 7, I use to piece it that much I could peel the skin off, this went on for years. This all started after I was molested at age 6.

As I into pre-teen I tried smoking when I was only 10, I also tried drugs, I got into fights. I use to just go out with boys. I remember hating me so much then, this is when my behaviour changed dramatically.

Coming into my teens my behaviour continued to spiral out of control, My self-harm went from pinning to burning, I went into full-on drug and alcohol use. Partied non-stop, I also had suicidal thoughts and even tried to suicide.

When I go back and think about what I did I showed so many signs something was wrong. Yet no one noticed. When I read about suicides it makes me upset. Most of the time the signs are there they are just missed. I’m so lucky I’m still here, but some aren’t so lucky.

Warning signs can’t be ignored if you see a change in someone’s personality or behaviour PLEASE don’t ignore it because one day it may be the day of no return.

17 Replies to “Unseen signs”

  1. Oh, Jen, I relate to so many of your posts. It took many decades before I had the nerve to come out about my childhood abuse. The aftermath has been an entire lifetime of depression and PTSD. I wrote my memoir Secrets in Big Sky Country- a memoir, about five years ago. Blogging helped get me there. I applaud your courage in sharing your truths and hope you find the healing you so deserve. ~ mandy ?

    1. Thanks Mandy, congratulations on the memoir, I would love to check it out. it does take a lot to open up, I applaud you too. The blogging is helping in so many ways, I hope it helped you heal as it’s slowly helping me come to terms with my life. Thanks so much for your kind words ❤️

        1. I’m the same, but don’t be ashamed ❤️ I not ashamed as I didn’t asked for what happened to me, I write because I want to educate people about what happens to people like us that go through trauma deal with growing up and how we suffer.

        2. Yes! I have found that speaking out fearlessly about my own truth and rejecting stigmatizing language is powerful, and I like to think that it’s how I contribute to the overall effort to bust up society’s stigmas about mental illness.

          1. Well done to you ? . I believe that that’s exactly what we need to do to get it out there in the end.

  2. Can I re-post this one or re-share? I only have few followers, but I would like the world to know that these kind of signs should not be ignored. And I’m sorry that you are molested at the age of 6. I can’t imagine. Thank God you are still here.

Leave a Reply